Conversations I Wish I Had

How I Quit The Bean And Became A Tea Person

Thought Catalog

MarinaMarina

Besides a breakdancing heart, the worst thing that happens during a caffeine overdose is your thoughts sprint around the inner rim of your head in spandex. They drink Gatorade and piss on the side of your braincase. This—the intracranial hustle—is a mental disorder in the DSM-V, right next to heroin addiction.

For me, the shit hit the French press when I was drinking five cups of bean spunk a day. This was two weeks ago. My neurons were writing dirty little poems to each other. I was krumping to the beat of Mr. Coffee. It was not pretty.

The hardest part was probably the feeling of horizontal lines. Let me explain myself. The hardest part was probably the feeling of horizontal lines. The hardest part was probably the feeling of horizontal lines. The hardest part was probably the feeling of horizontal lines.

See: Caffeine jacks your neurons. This…

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This entry was posted on November 19, 2014 by .
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